Difference between revisions of "Team:Harvard BioDesign/Team"
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WESTON, CT—Visibly shocked and repulsed by her own behavior as she sat questioning the type of person she is deep down, unsettled 2-year-old Ellie Ritter admitted to reporters that she had no idea what compelled her to bite her friend on the face Thursday. “I honestly don’t know what came over me. I know Jacob took the train I was playing with, but I usually handle that kind of thing okay—but this time I...I bit him,” said a shaken and bewildered Ritter, sitting wide-eyed on a floor mat at her daycare as she vehemently asserted that she had no prior knowledge of this dark, disturbing place within her. “I mean, this is Jacob we’re talking about. He’s my friend, my playmate. And I just went straight for his forehead like an animal. Jesus, what is wrong with me?” At press time, the unnerved toddler was staring uneasily down at her trembling, fingerpaint-covered hands and contemplating what other horrors she was capable of. -The Onion</div> | WESTON, CT—Visibly shocked and repulsed by her own behavior as she sat questioning the type of person she is deep down, unsettled 2-year-old Ellie Ritter admitted to reporters that she had no idea what compelled her to bite her friend on the face Thursday. “I honestly don’t know what came over me. I know Jacob took the train I was playing with, but I usually handle that kind of thing okay—but this time I...I bit him,” said a shaken and bewildered Ritter, sitting wide-eyed on a floor mat at her daycare as she vehemently asserted that she had no prior knowledge of this dark, disturbing place within her. “I mean, this is Jacob we’re talking about. He’s my friend, my playmate. And I just went straight for his forehead like an animal. Jesus, what is wrong with me?” At press time, the unnerved toddler was staring uneasily down at her trembling, fingerpaint-covered hands and contemplating what other horrors she was capable of. -The Onion</div> | ||
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NEW YORK—Following an evening of heavy drinking at local bar McGuire’s Tavern, 32-year-old Peter Larsen reportedly awoke with a hangover Wednesday and was horrified to discover he had made dozens of plans the previous night. “Oh, God, I can’t believe I said I’d get lunch with Emily and told Scott that I’d hang out next weekend,” said Larsen, rubbing his temples and lamenting that he never should have let himself get so out of control and recklessly commit to numerous social obligations. “I just hope I didn’t say anything stupid to someone from work about how I’d love to catch the new Fantastic Four with them when it comes out. It’s bad enough that I kept going on and on to Jeff about going on a camping trip together in August.” At press time, Larsen had reportedly resolved that in the future, he would stop drinking as soon as he noticed himself beginning to talk loudly about going in together on a beach house rental on Long Island. -The Onion</div> | NEW YORK—Following an evening of heavy drinking at local bar McGuire’s Tavern, 32-year-old Peter Larsen reportedly awoke with a hangover Wednesday and was horrified to discover he had made dozens of plans the previous night. “Oh, God, I can’t believe I said I’d get lunch with Emily and told Scott that I’d hang out next weekend,” said Larsen, rubbing his temples and lamenting that he never should have let himself get so out of control and recklessly commit to numerous social obligations. “I just hope I didn’t say anything stupid to someone from work about how I’d love to catch the new Fantastic Four with them when it comes out. It’s bad enough that I kept going on and on to Jeff about going on a camping trip together in August.” At press time, Larsen had reportedly resolved that in the future, he would stop drinking as soon as he noticed himself beginning to talk loudly about going in together on a beach house rental on Long Island. -The Onion</div> | ||
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Revision as of 04:06, 18 July 2015
NAME OF PROJECT
We are the Harvard iGEM team of 2015.
It's been an interesting summer together...
A real description will be added eventually... until then...
PICTURES
The Students
ATLANTA—Casually holding the drink between her index finger and thumb, a Delta Airlines flight attendant is at this moment trying to pass a cup of cranberry juice over your laptop, sources aboard the aircraft have confirmed. The plastic receptacle, which is filled nearly to the brim and rippling due to mild turbulence, is reportedly being extended across your expensive and relatively new laptop in the direction of the person seated next to you, who is currently nodding off and unaware his beverage has arrived. As the flight attendant leans in, dangling the juice above the computer containing work files and family photos you have not backed up anywhere else, witnesses are reporting that a passenger two seats behind you is trying to squeeze by both her and the beverage cart. Sources added that all of this is happening as the plane speeds at 500 miles per hour 40,000 feet above the earth. At press time, the person next to you was seen attempting to accept the drink and pass back a credit card with the same hand. -The Onion
